Mi Vida Loca

All the single ladies… (put on your big girl panties)

A few years ago whenever that song was played every woman jumped on the dance floor. It was not only a celebration of being a woman–second only to Gloria Gaynor’s I Will Survive–it was more importantly a celebration of being a single woman.

We are the women of today, we’re strong, independent and we are just fine without you, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!

As I sat by myself in front of the caricaturist at my work holiday party this past weekend–having followed all the couples–I felt it…that feeling of “wow, wouldn’t it be nice to have someone to be drawn with.”

As my next birthday approaches, the feeling is more palpable. So while I can get up and dance by myself like no one’s business, I can confess that being single is, while sometimes fun, not the end goal for me. The celebrating being a strong, single woman is sometimes just a facade. Not the strong woman part, but the wanting nothing more than to be single part.

Unfortunately, as women we’re not allowed to say “I want a relationship” out loud to anyone but our closest friends for fear of being seen as desperate and needy. It’s interesting that while we women are made to feel desperate when we let the world know that we want to be loved, men are praised for this admission because it shows emotional maturity. Theirs is a need to finally settle down, while ours is just plain neediness.

I say screw convention, ladies! What’s wrong with admitting that we are available and open to meeting someone. Being honest about our needs doesn’t diminish our strength, it doesn’t mean we can’t also be independent and it certainly doesn’t mean we’re needy.

It simply means that amazing as we are, we’re only human.

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7 thoughts on “All the single ladies… (put on your big girl panties)”

  1. so true! it annoys me to no end that the “rules” are so different for men and women. It should be just as admirable for a woman to confess what she wants, and you’re strong to do so. love you

  2. I don’t know who started that stupid rumor or rule (fuck the rules!), but I don’t believe it one bit. Actually, I think part of being a strong woman is voicing what you want and that includes when you want a relationship. Unless you share that desire with the world, how will the universe help you out?

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